7 Things I love About Being a Confident Fat Chick

First things first.Three years ago I could not have imagined writing this. But all my self-lovin’ work has paid off and I can actually see the good in my body now.

one

When I wear a fabulous, over the top outfit, people pay me compliments, and never mention my size or weight. It’s as though my confidence puts them at ease. And that’s a win for fatties everywhere!

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two

Hanging out with other confident fat chicks is so fun! We get each other’s jokes and share tips on how to prevent chub rub whilst soaking in a hot tub.

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three

Fat chicks give the best hugs. All that soft flesh feels like being in the womb. Seriously.

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four

I take up space. No matter where I am, my body is unapologetically present and proud.

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five

When I’m in yoga class, I love to see the expression of my teacher and other students as my flexible body holds  challenging poses. I’m unintentionally teaching women that you can be active at any size.

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six

You’ll never hear me complaining about being on a diet, because duh, I don’t do those anymore.

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seven

I use my hard earned confidence to help other women begin to embrace themselves, no matter what size they are.

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I send you love, light, and encouragement as you travel the road of self-acceptance!

xo

Don’t Fall Into the Trap of Weight-Loss Resolutions

It’s the time of year when everyone is talking about resolutions. Resolutions to buy less and be more; Resolutions to spend more time with friends and family instead of in front of the TV; and of course, resolutions to lose weight.

New Year's Resolutions

Just writing that sentence triggers me immensely. I’ve had decades of resolutions that were focused on losing weight once and for all. Thank God the last resolution I made was to not make resolutions anymore — especially about weight loss. I find them fraught with weighty expectation and inevitable disappointment.

If you haven’t already, you will soon be bombarded with ads for the latest exercise craze, discounted gym memberships, or the diet book that will finally change your life. Yep. It’s THAT time of year. And I fucking hate it. Even as a fat positive activist, I still find it all so overwhelming. 

Just for once, I’d like to get the message on January 1st that I’m OK just as I am. And because I know I won’t see that message on any billboard anytime soon, then I’ll do it — for you and for me!

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It’s certainly not wrong to want to lose weight or get fit, unless the desire is comes from a place of wanting to meet an unattainable version of yourself that someone else thinks is what you need. In that case, I am emphatically anti-weight loss. The reasons have to be internal. They must come from a genuine desire not to please anyone but yourself. And for many of us, myself included, that’s almost impossible.

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Even though I’m a size acceptance activist, I still have the occasional thought about losing weight. And it’s almost never about how I will feel physically. Almost always it’s about what I will look like, and how my life will be better. I don’t like admitting that, but it’s true. Thankfully these thoughts don’t come up nearly as much as they used to. But I have a history of disordered eating and self-loathing which I must put into check every day.  

Just so you know, not everyone who is fat or chubby wants to be thin. Advertisers would have you believe it, but it ain’t true. I know too many women (and men) who have found beauty, strength, and acceptance in their large bodies. And I’d like to think I’m one of them (though I still struggle). Their stories are a reminder of what it is to have serenity around our bodies, and I absolutely NEED those messages in my life.

Check these hotties out!

 

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Vanessa of Sweet Leigh Sewn

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Aarti of Curves Become Her

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Margot Meanie

Please know that if you are feeling the resolution blues, it’s ok. You’re not alone. Your body is perfect. Yes, even your fat rolls, jiggly thighs and wide hips! Most people in the world look like you — not Beyonce. I promise!

There is so much body positive stuff out there to support you on your journey. Of course I’m here for you always, but here are some other peeps who are talkin’ the talk too:

Today I am loving myself. Today I compare myself to no one. Today I am enough.

Happy New Year!

xo