You are enough, You have enough, You do enough.

You are enough,you have enough,you do enough

I’ll keep this brief.

We are constantly told that we aren’t doing enough — that we should achieve more, want more, be more, get more. The truth is, you have everything you need. You are everything you need. You are doing your best right now.

So print this image out and put it where you can see it everyday as a reminder of your enoughness!

xo

 

 

How I Wore my Furry Game of Thrones Vest and Slayed

This amazing  vest, which I purchased from Sears about a month ago, is so darn cozy I find myself wanting to wear it with everything. The only thing that could improve it, are pockets. And I just might have a tailor put them in for me.

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I usually wear a lot of color, but I was feeling super inspired by the challenge of how I could make a black and white outfit more interesting using pattern and texture. I think I achieved that with the “Game of Thrones” vest,  jacquard ponte pants, silk  scarf, and leopard print flats (details on where I bought the items below).

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Don’t be afraid of pattern! When you mix patterns together, the key to success is a scale jump — making sure the scale of each pattern is noticeably different. For example, my silk scarf has a rather large geometric print, which I balanced out with the jacquard pants in a smaller more organic pattern, and finally, a twist with the leopard flats. Remember that leopard is a neutral, and therefore goes with everything. Leopard is  your friend!

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BTW, these ponte knit pants are so comfy I could wear them to sleep!

 

It’s all in the details! A bright lip is always a good idea. I’m wearing Violetta by MAC (a personal fave).  Sunglasses are Zara. Jewelry is Stella & Dot. Hair is all mine!

DETAILS ON THE OUTFIT:

Black jersey top is Grace Elements purchased at TJ Maxx (size 3X)
Furry vest is Bongo from Sears (Size 2X)
Pants are Indigo Poppy purchased from Ross (Size 20)
Geometric scarf is Vince Camuto purchased at Ross
Shoes are Calvin Klein from Nordstrom Rack (Size 10)

*All photos taken by Tim Shugrue

Most of these items are from past seasons, so you may not find the exact pieces I’m wearing. But that’s a good thing! This is just meant to inspire you. So go find your own special pieces.

Inspiration Word

I hope you’ll remember to shop in places you might not have thought of previously. Even if a store doesn’t carry plus sizes (like Zara), you can still find great accessories and shoes. And be willing to dig a little — Ross is one of my favorite stores because I love hunting for a real bargain. That Vince Camuto scarf was $4.99!!! Allow yourself to explore the possibilities. Until next time, remember to love yourself without measure!

xo

Blue, Orange, & Checked All Over

Lately I’ve been feeling a bit preppy, and it’s been really fun to explore this side of my fashion personality. I used to think I could only wear things that hugged my curves or showed skin, in order to feel sexy and confident. But I’m discovering that sexy is an attitude, and that the fashion possibilities are endless if I’m willing to take chances.

I’m finding that wearing pieces that are oversized, or even a bit shapeless, can be very cool! In many ways, I feel more confident when I’m all buttoned up in something unexpectedly funky. I push myself to try new ideas because it’s a fantastic creative outlet, and well, it’s really fun.

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This bold orange, navy blue, and grey Old Navy sweater got so many compliments when I wore it. I usually wear a 2x, but this was an XL and fit just the way I wanted it to. I bought it an Old Navy outlet store recently, so I don’t know if it’s still available. But you should check anyway, just in case.

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The white button-down oxford shirt is by Van Heusen in a 2x, which I bought from Amazon, of all places. It’s so crisp, and I love the pointed collar. I plan to pair this shirt with lots of things! Watch is Fossil, and earrings and bracelet are Stella & Dot, which has such great jewelry. Admittedly, I’m addicted.

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My jeans are thrifted, and the booties are Sam Edelman (last season), which I bought from Ross for $35 –STEAL!!. They’ve been a favorite of mine since I got them. You’ll see them in the rotation a lot. I think the photo before this one shows them better.

My orangey lip color is a blend of Milani Sweet Nectar and Ruby Woo by MAC (which, by the way, looks great on EVERYONE!). I love mixing lipstick colors together — it’s a great way to expand your color options on a budget too!

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It’s a little tough to see in this shabby photo, but I added a pair of small earrings to the button holes in the collar for a little extra sparkle. I have lots earrings in different shapes, sizes, and colors that will make this basic oxford shirt POP!

Well, if I’ve learned anything from this experience, it’s that I need to take better pictures. Outside. During the day. I’m still getting the hang of this thing, people.

Until next time, I hope all your fashion choices make YOU feel good!

xo

Mixed Fat Chick Does Fashion?

I am anxiety-ridden as I write this post. I haven’t written anything for my blog in about two months, or perhaps more.

I was waiting to feel inspired.

But as a writer, it’s my job to write. To write, and write, and write. Practice. Practice. Practice.

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If I waited for inspiration every single time, I suspect I’d have time enough to master the violin. So, this is me, picking my instrument back up. I will Practice. Practice. Practice.

OK, now that my micro self-help session is out of the way….

So, here’s what I’ve been thinking about lately. I’ve been thinking about doing more plus fashion and plus style on mixedfatchick.com. The reason I haven’t done it more, is because I’m lazy. And I promise, I’m not being self-deprecating in the least. The mere thought of losing an extra 15-20 minutes of sleep so I can take proper photos of my OOTDs, brings to mind a simple and clear answer. No.

No. I don’t want to get up early. I want to sleep.

But…

But….

But….

A person has the prerogative to change their mind. And I have. Changed my mind, that is.

I know I don’t post much on the fashion front, but I always get such fun feedback and inspiration from my readers when I do.

Here are a few outfits I actually documented in 2015.

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Now let’s be clear. I don’t think I can promise daily posts on fashion, but maybe I could start with like, once or twice a month. Yes?

Because I really want to talk STYLE. Fashion and style are not one and the same. You can have fashion, and not have style. But for me, style is about learning who you are. It evolves as you do, so it changes all the time (at least for me). Which is why I love it! That, and it’s a great way to fight stereotypes about what fat women shouldn’t wear.

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But it’s also about exploring new silhouettes and getting out of your comfort zone. When I start collecting pieces for a certain look, it’s exciting to see it come together. I love that from one week to the next, I can go from preppy in pearls, to rockin’ a head wrap. My closet reflects that, which makes getting dressed a whole lot of fun!

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For instance, I want to do a post on 10 Ways I Wore My Fave Vintage Oxblood Velvet BlazerI know, right? And it’s stretchy velvet — but very structured! (I found it at Out of the Closet here in L.A.. Shhhhhh.)

Or maybe a feature on Accessorizing Like a Pro! I have A LOT of accessories and am always looking for innovative ways to combine the unexpected.

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OK, What else? What am I missing..?

Oh, also, I’m going to need to let my husband know that he’s now my official photographer! He’s awesome, so  I feel pretty good about it.

OK, I think that’s all I have in me today. And, I’m really excited about making magic with you in 2016!

xo

 

Things You Should Know and Other Stuff, Too

I’ve read some really good articles this week and thought I’d share with you those really resonated with me. As always, I want to hear your thoughts!

Catching Up With Gloria Lucas and Nalgona Positivity Pride    By NATALIE MISCOLTA-CAMERON

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Nalgona Positivity Pride is a community-based effort to increase body positivity in the Xicana/Brown*/Indigenous community. Started in Los Angeles in 2014 by Gloria Lucas, the organization relies on community outreach, support groups, social media, and even an Etsy store to spread its message.

I recently sat down with Gloria for a Q&A to find out more about NPP and the person behind it.

You’re personally recovering from an eating disorder. Can you talk a little bit about this?

I recall secretly hiding food, sneaking to the kitchen in the middle of the night and overeating as young as 11 years old. I started inducing purging in my late teens.

It took me some time to find out why I had an eating disorder (ED). Most of the current information that explains the causes of eating disorders never mentioned racism and classism, so I didn’t feel like those theories didn’t quite fit me. It was not until I read up on historical trauma that I realized that my unhealthy relationship with food is a deeper issue caused by colonialism, poverty, systemic racism, and cultural sexism. Historical trauma is a theory by Dr. Maria Yellow Horse Brave Heart which explains trauma as a transgenerational occurrence. In other words… READ THE FULL ARTICLE HERE.

 


Gabourey Sidibe Has the perfect Response to Love Scene Fat-Shamers      By ZEBA BLAY

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - NOVEMBER 05: Actress Gabourey Sidibe attends the Screen Actors Guild Foundation 30th Anniversary Celebration at the Wallis Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts on November 5, 2015 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by David Livingston/Getty Images)

On Wednesday night, the writers of “Empire” made a bold move when they included a scene of Gabourey Sidibe’s character Becky having sex with her boyfriend, MC J Poppa. The scene was refreshing because it reminded us that, yes, fat women like and have sex, and it shouldn’t be a big deal.

Unfortunately, the scene generated a few mean-spirited memes fat-shaming the actress. But, like the queen she is, the 32-year-old actress isn’t bothered.

In a blog post for EW published on Thursday, Sidibe wrote: “I, a plus sized, dark-skinned woman, had a love scene on primetime television. I had the most fun ever filming that scene even though I was nervous. But I felt sexy and beautiful and I felt like…” READ THE FULL ARTICLE HERE.

 


Looking Back: Our Fave Ashley Nell Tipton Instagram Moments Before Project Runway     By MARCY CRUZ

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Project Runway Season 14 winner Ashley Nell Tipton may be new to the mainstream fashion industry with her appearance on the show but to the plus size community, she is already well known as an amazing designer who creates clothing for women in sizes 1X to 6X. While many plus size designers only stop at a 3X, Ashley is one of those designers who truly embraces women of all sizes.

Many of us have loved Ashley before Project Runway and it is exciting to see her progress on the show and in her career. In honor of her win, we took a look back and here’s our favorite Instagram moments from… READ THE FULL ARTICLE HERE.


I hope you enjoyed my picks. I really wanted to highlight all the awesome things that fat women everywhere are doing. They are healing, they are thriving, they are succeeding!

xo

Gratitude Is The Best Medicine

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how I wish my life were different — quieter, simpler, more peaceful. I often go on these jags where I become obsessed with moving to the countryside and living in a small house with just the basics. In my imagination it seems like the ideal life. But the reality is that it’s not realistic for me, or for most people, I suspect.

So what do you do when you just feel like shit is weighing you down?

Find gratitude. Find it in all areas of your life, and it will totally shift the way you think about your present situation. Find the time for gratitude everyday!

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When I start to feel overwhelmed or sorry for myself I have to stop and remember that I am blessed beyond measure.

  1. I have a wonderful husband who adores me.
  2. I own an a lovely house that many people would be happy to have.
  3. I have some money in the bank and there is always food on the table.
  4. I wake up every morning and I can stand up without too much pain.
  5. I can see, hear, smell, touch, and taste easily.
  6. I have friendships with people I truly love and admire.
  7. I have a supportive network of people who are around to support me when I’m feeling bad about my body.
  8. I live in a place where it’s sunny pretty much everyday of the year.
  9. I have a family that is kooky but totally awesome!
  10. I have a job that allows me to earn a pretty decent living.

Take a few minutes in the morning or at night before bed to make a list of 5 or 10 things you’re grateful for. Remember, there is always someone somewhere that wishes they had what you have.

Sending love and light!xo

Why Do We Have to Be Pretty All the Fucking Time?

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When I wake up in the morning, one of the first things I do before getting out of bed is to decide what I’m going to wear that day. I scan my overflowing closet in my mind’s eye, carefully matching (or in my case, not matching) the pieces I think will work together. Next, my thoughts wander to the perfect lipstick color and how best to style my unwieldy mane.

Yes, admittedly my first few thoughts upon waking are about how I look. And I’m kinda over it.

So why do I do it?

The simple answer — habit. The complicated answer — I have been brainwashed by a media that is largely influenced by making a business out of ugly-shaming me. Like so many of you reading this, I get frustrated by the constant pressure that I have to be pretty just to go to the grocery store, or to work, or to socialize.

And let me also say that I love having fun in fashion. But in my heart of hearts, I know that sometimes I’m doing it so I can feel like I’m enough.

And I’m pretty sure I’ve been sold a heaping load of stinking bullshit.

As a society, we have intentionally decided that pretty is the thing you should be, but you can never really get. It’s a total setup. And it absolutely requires you to be vigilant about the kinds of messages you allow yourself to hear. I know, you’re probably thinking, well, Pia, tell us how to do that so we can go and fucking do it.”

First, a teeny bit about my experience. My rocky road to healing only really started when I began making the kinds of environmental changes that created a safe space in which I could begin to experience worth beyond my appearance. And as I always say, I have not yet arrived. The journey is in the healing, and the healing is in the journey.

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Social media was the turning point in my recovery. All of a sudden I had access to resources and support for how to move past my eating disorder and begin accepting my exhausted self. I met fierce activists, proud fatties, plus size designers, chubby bloggers, thin allies, and now dear friends, all of whom have had an impact on my healing.

And I let myself be raw. I told my truth so that the collective energy  from these relationships began to kindle my spirit. I summoned a strength I never knew I had. I allowed my  thick, light-deprived thighs to bask in the sun’s warmth, aware that no one at all gave me a second glance.

Instead of reading mainstream magazines, I began to read blogs that celebrated larger bodies. Rather than hold onto old jeans that no longer fit me, I embraced the amazing options in plus size clothing and found a style that took into account my fluffy proportions AND my personal style.  I made a conscious choice to surround myself with images, words, and relationships that supported my work towards self-acceptance.

I became part of a revolution to take back my life, my choices, and my dignity. And in the process I became me — a mixed fat chick who fights for justice whilst eating gluten-free donuts. Because I’m allergic to gluten. Not because I give a fuck about carbs.

Ya know, I really want to not be writing about this in five years. I hope there won’t be a need.

In the meantime, bombard yourself  with positive messages with the same energy you were using to beat yourself up. It takes effort and planning to make fundamental changes in your thinking and your behaviors. Don’t worry, there is no race to the finish line. Take all the time you need, and celebrate the victories — big and small — along the way.

Sending much love, light, and healing to you!

xo

 

P.S. I have an amazing E-Course coming later this summer. Stay tuned!!